for almost one month, i am still unable to truly face myself with the reality standing in front of me.

each & every time i open the google chrome browser, i've already set it to automatically open few pages i've added in the settings. for the 3 weeks, i don't even dare to open the browser because i feel pressured to open due to the drastic drop of my blog statistics & also all the memories i've had with these tabs, including gmail which we love to chat there, FB which there are a lot of photos with memories, and blog with even more stories & memories we've recorded down throughout the 2 years.

i told myself not to cry & i did it. i am able to swallow back all the tears at the moment. i told myself to be rational.

this is also the first time i've sick for almost one month & have not recovered. crying in the dream, fearing in both the conscious & subconscious minds, it's trauma. i don't know whether i should express my feeling here but seriously, the impact is far more worse & horrible than what i expected.

i've been so emo until i hate myself so much. may be it's the matter of time. it is...

it has been some time since i last blog. after 9 days, finally i am able to write something here.

something is happened in my life that makes me not able, or should i say i've lost my courage to blog. i scared to write even one word here.

the incident that happened has left me a deep trauma which i don't think i can let it go in a short period of time. also, this incident will also affect my life later, to get married or not, or even, to find another boyfriend or not. i have lost all my confidence within seconds, and, i've lost trust on almost everything. i see things from the bad sites and i couldn't think of one good thing in my mind since the incident happened. this blog has also a lot of memory that we have had last time. i don't even dare to access my blog to see a single word or even the URL of this blog.

things were just too good to be ended. life is just so unfair & we have to go through things like this. but, i am learning and growing. i ...........

Yup!!! Another century long I didn't blog. Two reasons. 1: I am busy with work. 2. I am sick. As for how I get sick, please refer here.

On Sunday I sick, Monday I was on MC leave, Tue & Wed I was working (thought I can handle it but apparently I couldn't, hence another leave today). My job scope is easy; to sit in the car for 8 hours and meeting people (lecturers, post grad studs, profs & docs) in UM, UPM, MARDI, CABI, MPOB, Jabatan Pertanian and so forth la.

That's all. But due to my job requires a lot of talking (as a product executive), so my sick can't recover in a very short time. Hence, I kepala pening.

So, that's all. I know it's lame. kthxbai. Yah yah, I know my life is boring.......

How to get sick in 6 days.

1. Monday - Curry Rice (with loads of curry) @ Mamak, Jalan PJU 10/10B
2. Tuesday - Chicken Rice (I finished the whole plate of chili sauce) @ Chicken Rice Shop, Jalan PJU 10/10B
3. Wednesday - Bah Kut Teh (I finished the whole plate of chili paddy) @ Berkeley, Klang
4. Thursday - Banana Leaf Rice (I finished the whole bowl of curry with the full with rempah spicy curry rice) @ Legend's, Serdang
5. Friday - Oh jian [Fried oyster] (I finished all the chili sauces & fried oyster is very oily & heaty) @ Hawker Stall, Penang
6. Saturday - Durian Meal (including Durian puff, durian spring roll, durian pao, durian pancake), Thailand cuisine (which spicy like no tomorrow with its unlimited chili paddy in the rice) @ Queensbay Mall, Bayan Lepas, Penang
7. Sunday - I am sick with sore throat, headache, fever, coughing and inability to converse T______T

BEEP BEEP!

Hi friends.... Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... I wasn't able to online yesterday cause the wi-fi service of the hotel bit retarded T______________T

Anyways, I just came back from Penang Island a moment ago, and guess what? I IZ EFFING SICK!!! I guess I will be taking an MC leave tomorrow  T____________T I can't talk, headache, throat swelling like WHAT!?

The causes of why I sick was because I everyday run in & out since last 28th Oct till today. And if without sick, I might need to continue until 12th Nov only I can have proper rest. But it seems like my body condition doesn't allow me to do so. Therefore, I AM CONPIRM GOING TO LEAVE TOMORROW!!! T_______________T

Also the sparks of this sick is due to my durian meal yesterday morning. FML max. I had durian pao, durian spring roll, durian pancake, durian puff all together. Ask me die or not? DIED!!!!

Even though I am offing tomorrow but there ares still tones of things for me to do...

1. Go Sunway Pyramid for my irritating HTC Aria. Something is wrong with the screen. FML. (i think i got the faulty unit lors!!)
2. To capture a formal photo @ don't know where.
3. To call BonusLink to redeem my points cause my PIN was locked cause I forgot the password. LAME!!!!

Oh yeah, the Penang trip, I drove almost 90% of it. Lolz.. I think 95% lars. Then, things I bought are a pillow & bolster. Cause it's having promotion @ Queensbay mall HAHHAAHHAHA!!

You know what? I've been keeping fit for the past two weeks & 3kg have gone but 3 days in Penang gained everything back!!! FML FML FML FML FML!!!

K, I don't know what I should I talk about now cause my brain so blur now & I'm fever, you know. @@ 

dahhhhhhhhhh...

Happy Deepavali.

kthxbai.

Oh! The warmest thing is I'm able to meet up with Kari for like 10 minutes? lolz.. Feel so warm. Fahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ♥v♥

I am supposed to blog today!!!!! but........

But because I woke up at 4.15 am today for my journey up to the north - Penang!!!

And I drove for the 80% of the day so I wanna (NEED TO!!!) rest now.

I love you!! AND YOU TOO!!!!

Catch me back tomorrow =D

Eh? what's that?

I've got my first salary!!!! Around 150 MYR lolz... It's for the three days working I had few days ago ^^

Today I talked a lot to the boss, cause 2 out of 7 of human in the office take leave and the other 3 went out for stuffs so the office has only me, the boss together with the admin. So, for the entire whole 9 hours, I was talking to the boss like no tomorrow.

We say about how is he gonna allocate me or so. How flexible the company is, my own email, name card, company hand phone & company laptop I am getting very soon. I've never ever thought the company can be as flexible as this & at the same time you can learn thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis much. You can learn as much as you can! As for now, what they can gimme & lemme know is that's all. So from this moment onwards, I've to read references & listing products as much as I can & if possible to remember each and one of them (which is not that possible lah).

So this is one of the product I am selling, the only & solely odd design micropipette and our company is the SOLE distributer! COOL MAX!!! And of course it looks weird also! But it's so much better than what I was using for past 4 years!!!!!!!!!

Ok, now I've a problem. Previously, I have one phone with me which is under Maxis, then after I met Kari, I have another one under Celcom, then just few days ago, for working purposes, I got myself a smartphone HTC Aria under DiGi & NOW!!! the company has gave me another phone. What-should-i-do-now?

*scratch head*

Think of it later. I need to rest until 930pm and start reading for company's stuff dee.

I so in love with my job!! Hope my friends have found job or supervisors for their master studies.

Oh yeah, I've just received a letter from UTAR officially tells me that I have completed my studies. FML I am damn happy with it. It's my effort after 16 years of studies life.

Kthxbai~