the mood...

now is indescribable.

After I receive the message from him I feel very very very exhausted. Whole body no energy. And suddenly feel like vomiting.

Suddenly thought of one thing. My parents always scold me no matter I did correct thing or wrong thing. Because they always think I am the one who bully people. My siblings were the one who being bullied and very kelian. From the moment I was born no one ever thing I am kelian. And stand in my shoe and think from my point of view. No one ever put extra care of me. I mean, if compared to others. I know I should not. That is why I always keep quiet when things are not as what I expect.

I scared I really going to vomit now. I think I have trauma of LDR. I really think I am.

95% when I call him, he answered with B-U-S-Y. I really don't know who am I to him. And when he is with me, he always can answer all the calls without saying busy. Who-am-I?